In less than three months from now, all of us will be embracing the ‘new year’ of 2018. Though it’s just a number and a date in our calendar; the idea of starting out on a ‘fresh’ new year fills us with positive emotions and a perpetual desire and passion to dream big for the coming year…
Our dreams could be anything from eating healthy; hitting the gym every day to build a better body; to stop smoking; reading a book every day, wake up at 5 AM; make more time for family; and many other goals which we desire so much to have in our lives.
But sadly, most of us, at the turn of the next year, find ourselves back to square one - once again listing out the same ‘resolutions’ we so wish to accomplish for yet another ‘new year’.
Our influencer today for this BLOGSpeaK post; James Clear says, the reason why we fail at achieving these goals or dreams of ours – is that we trick ourselves into believing that these transformations can happen in less time. We hear stories of people losing 110 pounds; building million dollar business in a year; writing a best seller without any previous writing experience… we tend to get obsessed with the results and romanticise on the outcome; rather than focus on the process.
James is an entrepreneur, weightlifter, travel photographer, and most importantly a ‘habit guru’ and a writer, who writes on behavioural psychology, habit formation, and performance improvement.
His ideas can be found through his books: Transform Your Habits, Mastering Creativity, Atomic Habits and Foundations of Strength. You can also find most of his ideas through his popular portal JamesClear.com.
James believes that success and true transformation is possible if we stop ‘over obsessing’ with the results and start developing regular positive habits; which is what actually fulfills our dreams and shapes us in the long run; to be the person or to actualize the dream we so desire.
Today, we look into some of James’s ideas on how we can transform or build better habits; as essentially our life is the sum of our daily habits and the many tiny decisions we make each passing day:
The 3 R’s Of HABIT Formation
The 3 R’s of Habit are: Reminder, Routine and Reward. The Reminder is the one that initiates or triggers the desire. The Routine is the actual behaviour and the Reward is the benefit you gain when you perform the routine.
REMINDER
The first thing you need to do is to set a ‘REMINDER’ for your new habit. James says - contrary to what people believe about having strong ‘will power’ ‘motivation’ or ‘self-control’ to form a habit – being a human, your memory and motivation will actually fail you.
So the trick is to use any habit/behaviour that you already do; as an ‘anchor’ or ‘reminder’ for this new habit you’d like to build.
For instance, if you need to develop a habit of flossing your teeth, use ‘brushing your teeth’ (which is your regular habit) as a reminder to floss. However, James recommends that you make yourself extremely easy to follow through to your new habit - he always puts a handful of pre-made flossers into a bowl next to his tooth brush as an easy ‘trigger’ to complete his new habit, every time he brushes his teeth.
Remember how the pre-made flossers reduces the number of ‘steps’ needed in the process; whereas with the regular floss, you go through the hassle of pulling out the ‘floss strings’ from its container; twirling it around your fingers before you actually start the action.
It’s best if you can come up with your own creative ideas for such reminders. Another nifty example is to prepare and place your running gear (jogging clothes, shoes, earphones, etc.) right next to your bed. This saves you from the hassle of looking for something to wear early in the morning. You can easily get into the jogging gear, even if you’re half asleep- which automatically motivates you to perform the next act after that – i.e. running!
ROUTINE
Out of the 3 R’s, Reminder is most definitely the crucial one whereas ROUTINE is the actual HABIT in the making. To make your habit more sustained and an ingrained one; and to bring lasting changes, James suggests that you don’t take massive chunk in your first bite; but start small! He quotes Leo Babuta on this; who says, “Make it so easy that you can’t say no!”
For instance, if you want to floss your teeth; just start by flossing one tooth to make your accomplishment easier; then build on it as you feel comfortable. If you’d like to run a marathon, start with just going round few blocks every morning. The trick is to consistently perform, no matter how miniscule it feels – you can always build up to the level you wish, once the behaviour is automatic and consistent.
Having said that, being human we do fail at times and are prone to unforeseen circumstances which take us off track, making us miss our routines at times. James stresses that you need to abandon the ‘all-or-nothing’ mentality and the perfectionist attitude. Everyone makes mistakes, even the top performers in the game; he suggests combating such so called ‘failures’ with three magic words, “Never Miss Twice” .
The message here is, you shouldn’t expect to fail, but rather plan for failure; and as James says, research also shows that failing once doesn’t have any measurable impact on the long term progress.
Planning for failure signifies anticipating any emergencies or circumstances that are more likely to derail you or pull you off course when you’re pressed with time. Therefore, even if you miss once, use that ‘missed opportunity’ as a trigger or reminder to bounce back quickly and build a strong identity of a person who never misses a habit twice!
REWARD
It’s in human nature to continue doing things that makes us feel good. The ‘REWARD’ is all about patting yourself on the back whenever you practice your new habit. The more you reward yourself; for instance by saying to yourself ‘good job’ or, ‘Victory’, or ‘Success’ each time you make it to the gym – then you’ll find the ‘impetus’ to repeat the behaviour and turn it into a stable habit.
Rewarding yourself with positive affirmations will complete the ‘loop’ and propel you to enjoy the success more, as it also magnifies your confidence and self-worth!
To Sum It Up…
Let’s not forget that ‘motivation’ and ‘will power’ are not responses that we can completely rely on, to achieve our dreams; or to have mastery over any subject that we so desire. Dreams, goals, and aspirations can only be reached if we commit ourselves to consistently perform relevant, positive sets of habits, and stick with it for the long haul!
If you'd like further assistance or would like to discuss anything covered today, we'd love to hear from you.
Call Andy Fox (me) on (03) 5249 5570 or email andy@element7digital.com.au
Our Website is www.element7digital.com.au
